Video games have their moments when you can’t help but feel the whole world is against you, frustration eventually leads to salty feelings. Those feelings where you want to pick up the monitor and heave it across the room. But today we have the cure – or at least a bandage – for those salty salty wounds, a list of how to stop those negative feelings in their tracks. Here are five ways to combat video game salt.
The Breather Method
This is a preemptive strike, it should be the primary method to stop the moody Judys. If getting bent out of shape, your blood is starting to boil and you can barely get up before you get knocked back on your butt? Take a break for a few. Go make a snack, have an Eggo. Take a dump. Do something that’s going to take your mind off of that problem for a while. Then when you’ve leveled off you can come back and see the situation with a firm head on your shoulders and maybe even surmount it! This method may not work however if you’ve already fallen too deep down the salt mine, but never fear that’s what the rest of this list is for.
The Jaunty Tune Method
Find a song that you vibe with, one you love and that lifts your spirits. When things get rough play it – or sing it – and hopefully you can gain some solace in the levity it brings. It’s sort of a way to remove yourself from the situation, if only a bit. Personally I pull out that Frozen sound every time it gets too bad, put that mic on mute “Let It Go” and sing like Elsa. Or sing it to your team – I’m definitely guilty of singing R. Kelly’s Remix to Ignition for a group a strangers. The point is that you’re taking a little step outside yourself to collect your head space.
The Funny Word Method
This one is a little off the wall, but it’s one of my favourites. Start by picking a word that you like or one that makes you laugh. “Stanky,” “titmouse,” “mukluk” I use “butt-hole” but hey, I’m pretty low-brow when it comes to this stuff. Whenever you feel that rage rising inside yourself throw that word into your grief. “These dumb butt-holes keep gankin’ me!” or “I need some support ya butt-holes” “Since when could he move like that!? WHAT A BUTT-HOLE!” The thought here is that you can start to appreciate the situation for being more ridiculous rather than strenuous. Laughter and humour really help to relieve stress in situations that feel heavy and frustrating. So pick a word and make yourself laugh.
The Popsicle Stick Method
Popsicle sticks come in bundles and are crazy cheap, certainly cheaper than buying a whole new controller, monitor or ottoman. The feeling of frustration that comes along with video games is often coupled with the urge to break something, you may need a catalyst to unleash your anger on. Buy a bunch of popsicle sticks, when you feel that need to break something? Pick up a stick and snap it. The more angry you get the more popsicle sticks you can add – snapping 50 popsicle sticks all together is a sure sign you need to take a break. This method can save your furniture or your renter’s deposit and leaves you with a clean up rather than a patch up.
The Mute-Their-Ass Method
Lastly, there will always always be that one ******* on the team who harangues you about how much you suck and how amazing they are. They’ll tell you how to play, who to play and what to do. Inevitably a person can only take so much and you’ll begin to go down a salty trail; do yourself a favour; mute them. It seems overly simple but it’s the best solution. Toxic dudes like the one who’s yelling and criticizing don’t add much to winning, so you’re not going to lose if you can’t hear them. Don’t engage them and don’t call them out, just take a breather from them.
Ultimately this list won’t work for everyone – sometimes the salty-ness is too strong. What’s important to remember is that removing yourself from the situation is going to help. This may not mean removing yourself from the game, but instead try to remove the negative emotions that are bombarding you and making you go all Lawry’s Seasoning Salt.
We’d love to hear in the comments below what you have done to combat video game salt on your own terms and if you have any tips or tricks let us know!