Gamers can speak about fandom with a passion; if you bring up their favourite game, show or movie you better get strapped in for a comprehensive 40 minute conversation. But there seems to be a difficulty and a taboo around speaking about ourselves. Recent comments made by Hi-Rez SMITE streamer DM Brandon about suicide and mental health have sparked a conversation, so let’s jump on this flame and start conversing.
Five percent of the world’s population has it. Most people have felt its dreary drop every once in a while and sometimes it completely defeats you; laying in bed – it feels – is the only option. Depression hits hard, any mental illness is tough to deal with and the stigmatization that’s coupled with it doesn’t make life any easier.
Personally, I’m no stranger to these feelings and in a weird way I’m almost ashamed to admit it, but I do have a few mental health “concerns” – as the doctors have so lovingly put it. I feel ashamed that I see myself as weak, that crowds and buses make me anxious that sometimes I’m afraid to leave my house. I’m really ashamed that I can only have two coffees before I move into a full-blown panic attack.
It’s this stigma that I should be ashamed or quiet about my mental health that makes the fight so hard. And it’s comments like DM Brandon’s that don’t help. The guy’s already been raked through the coals – and rightfully so. I’m going to steer clear of his specific comments because his statement itself is unimportant. There are bigger and more fruitful conversations that those comments can make.
As game enthusiasts, we’re a passionate bunch. We take things to heart and the culture is our life. Yet we are in a constant state of isolation, we speak over IM and voice chat but when the going gets rough a lot of people don’t know where to turn. The most important piece to remember is you’re not alone; if things do seem like you have 0 lives left and that little inner voice starts to sound like DM Brandon, you’re not alone, thanks to organizations like Take This.
Take This was founded in 2012 by Russ Pitts and Susan Ardett, it’s a charitable organization designed to help gamers and geeks in need struggling with anything from anger to depression. The whole movement was set in motion by Matt Hughes, who had been a reviewer and journalist working with Ardett and Pitts. Hughes sent an email one night stating he wouldn’t be able to finish his ongoing projects because by the time they had read his email he would be gone. By morning when the two had opened the message, Matt Hughes has taken his own life.
Stories like Matt’s are sadly too common in the game community, pushing Ardett and Pitts into action to found Take This. Ardett perfectly encapsulates the problem when she says, “Although we’re okay telling each other about our gaming experiences, we’re not really comfortable talking about ourselves. Especially not in regards to things that make us seem different.” This is that stigma that makes people stop talking about their issues before they even start, it’s exactly what Take This tries to break and why the comments made by DM Brandon were so detrimental to people who do deal with depression and anxiety or OCD on a regular basis.
Gamers typically have a great tolerance for acceptance. Graphics change, consoles evolve and so do we, but it’s important to know that there are resources out there if you need them. The Take This site explains a host of issues you may find your self dealing with from a perspective that relates to you. It gives advice and options in a situation that seems option-less.
And lastly I said I would try not to bring up the specific comments, and I won’t. But I would like to say that, DM Brandon’s opinion on mental health is shockingly misguided. I hope he takes this time to reflect on his actions and maybe gain some perspective, or at least a little empathy.
And to whoever he directed this rant at? Go on living. Because you deserve to and you deserve to rub your future happiness in his face, and anyone’s face who says you shouldn’t be here! Take it from someone who’s been right at the edge, you matter. And to all those gamers out there who struggle day-to-day? It can get better – it can be hard – but that pit of despair or fear or loathing? It is not endless, regardless of how it may feel.
What do you think about mental health in gaming? Please leave some stories and triumphs in the comments, it’s always great to hear when someone manages to punch their problems back in their place! It motivates the rest of us!
