Top 5 Ways to Get Your Girlfriend into Gaming

Playing video games can represent a significant investment of time, especially depending on what you play. Some games are easier to pick up, play a little and step away from, particularly anything that’s focused on an intense, fast-paced multiplayer experience. But if you’re like me and love games like Fallout 3, Mass Effect or Dragon Age Origins where exploration and deviation from the main plotline is encouraged it can be difficult to get full satisfaction from a scant few minutes of gaming. In youth it’s easy to devote scads of time to exploring every digital world you come across, but in adulthood it becomes harder to fit into your schedule. Jobs, children and social lives demand attention! Having a girlfriend, boyfriend or spouse who ‘just doesn’t get it’ can be a hassle, since they might rather spend leisure time watching television, building birdhouses or something. I stand as living proof that not only can gamers everywhere continue to play long after settling down into a loving, happy relationship, but that it is indeed possible to make gaming a shared pass-time between you and your girlfriend. I’ll tell you the top 5 ways to get her into gaming (without using a Nintendo Wii).

5. Start Simple: There’s a reason why the Wii is so popular and it has less to do with a love for overweight plumbers than ease of operation. Modern controls are encrusted with buttons, knobs and joysticks that we manipulated with practiced ease. It’s important to remember that things aren’t simple for those just starting out. Some control schemes are very complex and difficult to master. I myself took the better part of a year to truly master the double analog stick FPS control scheme. Above all, it’s important to pick something that’s easy. Fighting games like Street Fighter or Soul Calibur can be good jumping off points, because you can control the level of difficulty by choosing versus matches and simple button mashing can be extremely fun. Anything that’s got a 1-on-1-competition mode is a good choice for the same reason. Playing something that you can’t really lose is an especially good idea.

4. Tutorials Aren’t Enough, Games are Hard: No matter how basic you think a game is you’ll arrive at a point where your initiate is confused or boggled by the on-screen directions. It’s exceedingly important to be patient and willing to explain anything and everything about the game. If circumstances permit, allow your initiate to play around a bit and experiment with what they can do. Be encouraging when they get it right and supportive if they mess up/fall off a cliff/get devoured by a dragon. It’s also very important to be devoting all your attention to helping them figure it out. Stop what you’re doing in the game to assist them, no matter what’s happening to you. Remember, you can always start over. Giving a refresher on controls each play session may be necessary and should be encouraged.
3. Know Thy Girl Gamer: It’s extremely important to select what you’re going to play based on who you’re trying to play with. If your initiate is the type to hide behind pillows during a horror film, co-op Resident Evil might not be the best choice. Either of the Viva Pinata games are an excellent choice for those who abhor violence and love cute things, though there you have to deal with the inevitable demise of cute piñatas by more predatory ones. Keep in mind that not all licensed games are bad as well. My fiancée has always been a big X-Men fan and was excited about getting to play as some of her favorite characters.

2. Give Her The Reins: Letting your initiate control the pace and frequency of gaming can be crucial to not burning them out. I know there are few cases where I’m against the idea of playing video games, but your initiate might need a break now and then. When a particularly frustrating boss battle arises, many of us feel a certain challenge to our prowess is implied and labor as though under a geas, throwing ourselves at the foe or obstacle until it is broken under our relentless onslaught. Your initiate though might tire after one or two attempts. Always make it clear that you’re willing to stop whenever they are. Making your initiate aware that half the fun is playing with them is important.

1. Keep Her Playing (and Happy): It’s just like in dodgeball. It’s no fun to be the first one out, sitting on the sidelines and watching everyone else have fun. If you’re playing a game where one player can lose/die/etc, be sure to devote as much energy as possible to bringing her back in, even if you’re burning through health tokens/potions/etc. If revival is impossible and you’ve got a long slog ahead of you, reload the level. One excellent way to keep your girl interested is to give them first pick of any bonuses/upgrades/etc. Boost their character before you tweak your own. Reading FAQs online to help give suggestions on how to best utilize their character is helpful as well, since they’ll likely by a bit overwhelmed by some of the endless numbers or statistics.

Remember, these are just our top 5 tips to your girlfriend into gaming, there’s no guaranteed way of pulling someone (especially an uninterested female) into the world of video games and it all comes down to the individual person. In that case the best you can hope for is a better understanding for your hobby by the person you are attempting to get into gaming. If you can accomplish that at least the two of you will connect on some level, even if it is just small steps. Remember that this guide does not apply to those girl gamers that are so skilled at gaming they would even kick my ass, this is by no means meant to be a sexist article as girls have the same ability to be gamers as guys do.

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